Living Dolls
by Darklady
Summary: First in the s*x toys series. Challange fic. Strange. You are warned.


Living Dolls by Darklady  
  
Disclaimer: JKR owns the characters. I own a computer, and I'm not afraid to use it.  
  
Slash?: Of some sort. I don't think this is what is normally meant by sex toys, but....  
  
Rated: R  
  
Note: One read. One spell check. No beta. No time. This is for kae's 'plot bunny' challenge. I have personal issues with a certain pink boxed doll who's name begins with B. Plus? Some ideas are just too *evil* to ignore.  
  
Archive: Ask  
  
~HP~*~SS~*~HP~*~SS~*~HP~*~SS~  
  
"Time for your bath, honey." Hermione Granger - ne Weasly - called from the top of the stairs.  
  
"Yes mommy." Young Harriet Alba Granger-Weasly stood up reluctantly. She had been having *such* fun with the new dolls. But when her mother got *that* tone in her voice? Better to obey then to find oneself levitated into the bath with no hope of magic bubbles because mother was angry. "I'm coming."  
  
Ronald Weasly smiled as his daughter rushed upstairs.  
  
Harriet should have tucked her dollies back into their 'Immobilito' charmed boxes, but... she forgot in her rush to not keep her other waiting. So the little figures remained on the sofa.  
  
Ronald Wesley walked over to view the scattered playthings.  
  
These were the latest thing. Hero dolls. Much like the universally popular Wizard Cards that came with chocolate frogs, but three dimensional. Inspired by a Muggle toy with a girls name. Hermione Granger had brought along several of the overdressed 'fashion' mannequins when she moved into her first apartment - conveniently close to Ron Weasly over the Weasly Brother's second shop - and they had been both a revelation and an inspiration to the twins.  
  
Within a month Fred and George had arranged for the same Muggle companies to produce a select line of Wizard figures. A quick enchantment to give them movement and personality? The Weasly's had a best seller in their hands.  
  
Even if the 'Snuffles' dolls tended to growl when you picked them up wrong. And the Neville Longbottom dolls kept falling off the shelves.  
  
No matter. Wizard children were delighted. Demand was incessant. Sales were booming. Galleons flowed in so fast that Gringotts had been forced to assign a special Goblin just to count it.  
  
And that had been just the beginning. The 'Villain' line - including Malfoy and Pettigrew - had proved even hotter. Even if Malfoy's lawyers had eventually made them stop giving away a free box of pins with every doll purchased. Ron sighed. Some people just had no sense of humor.  
  
After that had come clothes, and charms, and potions kits, and licensed merchandise of all sorts. Lunch boxes and coffee cups and.. well, Ron suspected he would have lost track himself if it hadn't been his job to keep track of such things.  
  
Five years later Ronald and Hermione Weasly were still living over the shop - but that was just to spare the commute after their long hours managing the growing Weasly Toys enterprise. The 'shop' was a huge emporium that took up a quarter of a block on Diagon Alley.  
  
The Weasly's were a success story. Even Percy was impressed with his baby brothers. Life was *good*  
  
With their new 'War Wizards' Special Edition Gold-Box Premium Collector's Set due to launch tomorrow?   
  
Life was *bloody marvelous*.  
  
These figures Harriet had been playing with were indeed the *very* latest thing. More animated. More lifelike.  
  
Ron picked up the Severus Snape doll. It sneered. Just like the real thing. Fabulous.  
  
Flitwick had really done a wonderful job getting the humunculli vitus charm just right. It was worth every penny of the increased research budget.  
  
Ron sneered back. Or tried to.   
  
Strange what the customers went for, sometimes. Snape had never done much for him, but if you trusted the market research wizards? Witches fourteen through forty were all but *fixated* on what they tended to call the Slytherin Sex God. Oh well, if that's what they wanted.  
  
He tucked it snugly on top of the sofa pillow, next to the new 'Harry Potter Wizard Duel Figure'. The line already had a Harry Potter, of course. Student-Harry was the first of their line, and still the best seller. Then there was Teen-Quidditch Harry, aimed at the older boys market. But this was Harry at twenty-three, and came complete with Mage's robes and it's own book of defensive spells.  
  
Green eyes flashed up at Ron as the edge of his sleeve disturbed the eleven inch plastic figure. Now *that* was a hot toy. He didn't need the marketing department to tell him that. Wizard Harry would sell out even faster then the now-collectable Transforming Lupin doll.  
  
The boxes were around somewhere, but Ron didn't feel like hunting for them. The dolls could sleep on the sofa overnight. After all, the Weasly apartment itself was warded against theft and wandering - the last vital to any magical family with small children - and? Ron gave a little grin as he snuggled the two figures closer together. How much trouble could one eleven inch doll get into overnight? Even a Harry Potter doll?  
  
The mental answer and a few guilty memories almost had Ron going back to look for the boxes. Then he reminded himself that there was also a twelve inch *Snape* doll to keep an eyes on Harry and ruin any fun the mannequin might get up too. At least, that was the way Ron remembered it working in school. So he flicked his wand at everything except the one night light - also inevitable in a home with children - and went off to bed.  
  
~HP~*~SS~*~HP~*~SS~*~HP~*~SS~  
  
"Miserable brat." The Snape doll sent a look of generalized disdain at the family rooms overhead. His voice was small - he was a doll after all - remarkably deep for the minuscule mouth and chest it came from.  
  
"You're just aggrieved because she tried to put Sinistra's robes on you." The Harry doll leaned over.   
  
"Sinistra was bad enough. But she had a *Lockhart* outfit." Tiny plastic shoulders shuddered.  
  
Harry-doll's arm reached out to encircle those shoulders. "She's jut a child. Much too young for the Slytherin Sex God."  
  
The Snape figure grimaced, pulling away slightly. "You know I hate that name." He did. He really did. The hiss behind the words deepened from pro-forma to sincere.  
  
Harry used the freedom to unbelt his elaborate scarlet and gold robe. "Just be grateful that legal told Fred he couldn't put it on the packaging."   
  
Snape's fingers went to the few remaining buttons of his own elaborate black silk robes. Normally dealing with the long line of fasteners would have been a lengthy task, but Harriet Alba had gotten most of them undone in her earlier explorations, and a child's fingers just hadn't been up to the task of refixing them all. Given the late hour, the Snape doll just gave up and unfastened it completely. It could air overnight, and look fresh in the morning. He wouldn't want the shoppers to see him at less then his well-tailored best.  
  
"I swear, if the twins try that I will *hex* the pair. Amicus charm or no amicus charm." He referred to the spell put on all 'animated toys, to guard against the possibility of toy-box uprisings of the sort Muggle horror movies were made about.  
  
Folding both robes and tucking them beside their tiny pointed hats, the Harry doll arranged a comfortable nest among the sofa pillows. "You know you won't need to." Primarily because - charm or no - Wizard children learned young to take *very* good care of their toys. After all, one sulking teddy bear could make the whole house miserable until it was placated. "Real-Severus will do it for you."  
  
"I should hope so." Severus unbuttoned the ankles of his tightly tailored trousers, allowing him to pull off his meticulously formed black leather shoes. "But I still can't believe that he allowed them to use his... my... *our* image to amuse *children*."  
  
Harry pulled off his now-trademark jumper and tossed it on top of his robes. "Fred and George were insisting that Snape was a public figure,and threatening to go ahead anyway." A quick pull added a pair of loose fitting Muggle-style jeans to the pile. "At least this way we're a limited edition collectors version."  
  
The Snape figure was still working the buttons of his dark green brocade vest. "So we only get stuck in boxes a few *hundred* times."  
  
"So." Harry unpeeled his shirt and stretched broadly. "We cost a fortune, and no *reasonable* person." Emphasis on the last word cut off any argument about the recent past. Any version of Severus Snape would be the first to state that the Weasly clan was not reasonable. "No *reasonable* person is going to let a child play with any of us."  
  
"So I should hope." The unspoken implication included 'for their sake'. Even as a twelve inch fashion doll the Potion Master knew enough to make common household supplies into a mix of Dark Vengeance.  
  
The Harry Potter doll read the look, and hoped privately that the Weasly's - or their lawyers - had been foresightful enough to include a wavier and warning on the package. Just in case.  
  
"Also" Harry took the vest from the other dolls hands, shaking it out before adding it to the pile."Unlike lesser dolls we are fully articulated, anatomically complete, and come with real hair and eyes that open and *shut*. The Harry doll's voice had a tired note that implied the last might be most in his mind. After all, Harriet Alba had played with him too, even if he hadn't received quite the attention as had the taller doll. He lay back on the softest corner of the sofa pillow, pulling a sleeve doily over as a comforter.  
  
"Anatomically complete, Mr. Potter?" The high collared white shirt had fewer buttons,and came off swiftly.  
  
"Sev." Harry took in the well carved expanse of pale plastic chest. The doll designers really had managed a remarkable accuracy of detail. He wondered if that vinyl was as soft and yielding as it looked. Temptation loomed, but... "It's late." Harry's resistance sounded weak - even to his own ears.  
  
"We're going to spend all day tomorrow in a bloody shop window." Snape-doll slid over and knelt beside the plastic Potter. "You can sleep then."  
  
"I suppose." Harry raised his curved hand onto one now-bare thigh. It was smooth, and sleek, and the muscles had been perfectly carved into the long lines of leg. "You'll certainly be more merchandisable with your mouth shut."  
  
A feeble rejoinder, but they had never taught 'Defense Against the Dark Remarks' at Hogwarts. At least not on the curriculum. Life with Snape was an on going practicum.  
  
"Whereas you would doubtless be more attractive with your mouth open." Snape took the other dolls hand and moved it up under the tiny black silk boxers he still wore. "And about here."  
  
Harry-doll could feel another bit of pressed vinyl swelling impressively. His lips opened, and another bit of his *own* sculpted anatomy swelled in response. He rolled up to his knees and pushed the last silk away from his throbbing prize. Yes indeed, there would be a good place for his lips indeed. A very good place. He twined his tongue around the inch and a half of hardening plastic, and reveled in the shivers that ran though the other dolls framework.  
  
A flip,a twist, and soon they were side by side, with Snape reversed, and his own heated vinyl was being devoured by Snape's generous mouth. Bean size balls rolled in their thin sac below Harry-dolls delicately stamped fingers. Another finger, longer but just as fine, found it's way to rear entrance.  
  
Pressing inside, the tiny plastic finger hunted for and found a doll sized point of pleasure.  
  
In the seconds before he gave himself up to utter ecstasy, the Harry doll spared a last kind thought for the doll designers responsible for this accuracy. They really had done a remarkable job.  
  
~HP~*~SS~*~HP~*~SS~*~HP~*~SS~  
  
*FINISHED?????*  
  
KKR 2002  
  
  
  
  
  



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